Monday, July 8, 2013

Insecurities..

I'll be the first to admit it; I'm one of the most insecure people I know. Whether it be about my body, my hair, my nose, my personality--I never feel good enough. Speaking from the perspective of an 18 year old girl, I obviously belong to the vast majority of young adults figuring things out, as well as picking themselves apart--deciding what part of them is good or bad. I am definitely one of those people that feels like appearance wise, I am nothing but average, I have low self-esteem when it comes to my body, and I feel like there's so much improvement that can be done to myself in general.

PQOTD.. Taken from Tumblr.
Now I'm not saying that that's what other people tell me. Of course, my family says I'm one of the prettiest girls they've ever seen (blablabla, typical family talk), and my friends will deny that I have any fat on my body (TOTAL LIARS), and guys say I'm hot (but they say that to every girl out there, so,...). But at the end of the day, none of that matters if I don't feel it myself. I mean, they always say that the only way for the other people to love you is to love yourself, right?

I've always been one to believe in the idea that if you don't like something about yourself, change it. I don't mean change who you are to please other people or to become a completely new and different person (even though I personally love those transformation shows). I mean if you have an issue with your weight, get on the treadmill and try to burn that fat off. If you have alot of acne that's bothering you, then research all the methods to permanently get rid of it. If you feel you're too shy, find a way to open yourself up and be more outgoing and confident in yourself. But let's be honest here, everything is easier said than done. It's always difficult to make such changes because it does require quite a bit of work and effort, and I for one have this laziness gene that honestly stops me from finishing most things (already mentioned in another post). Lately, though, I have been pretty motivated to make a change in myself and in my life, and that's mainly due to going to college in less than two months.

I've always envisioned myself a completely new and improved Me once I got into university. You know, fit and toned, totally confident, accomplished, motivated and goal oriented, yadayadayada. But what I never realized was that in order to become all of these things, I need to put in the work. You don't just wake up being a new person; it takes time, effort, and dedication. And being so close to finally being a university student, it's hit me that I'm nowhere near these goals! Given, I have many, many, MANY years ahead of me to complete these changes and goals, but I still don't feel comfortable in the body that I'm in now.

So I've decided to make the best out of my summer, and finally achieve those goals that I've put off so many years, so I finally become the person I want to be!
Write in the comment section if you're going through this journey too, and if you have goals that you want to achieve too!

xx, Raneem 

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Finish What You Start

See that sentence up there? Yeah, well, that's mainly directed to yours truly. I've always had this problem: finishing what I start. I don't know what it is about completing a task that is so difficult to me, but I just can't seem to do it! And I mean finishing almost anything! Even finishing up a blog post (hence my lack in posts in general).

Now, I have a couple theories as to why this happens to me.

Found this somewhere on tumblr, and found it really cute.
1) I tend to be a perfectionist in things that I care about. For example, in order for me to complete a blog post (kudos to me for even finishing this one), it needs to live up to the standards that I've put for myself. The problem is, I feel like in so many ways, I don't have the knowledge or power to do the things I want to do to their full potential! Which brings me to...

2) I get frustrated easily, which leads to me quitting. Now, being the perfectionist I am (in certain things), when I feel like I can't finish a project perfectly, I just give up before I even finish! In my head, it's like, why even bother when I know it's not going to succeed. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is one of the main reasons for failure. If you never try, how can you succeed?

3) Laziness? As much as I hate to admit it, I can be on a bit of the lazy side of things. Okay, maybe a lot on the lazy side. But, in my defense, it does come back to reasons 1 and 2. And maybe my whole shyness thing going on. I'm too damn scared about what people will think of me, and it sucks! I really need to stop with that crap.

And last but not least... 4) Impatience. I am probably one of the most impatient people I know! I honestly have an issue. When I start anything, I hope (and even expect) immediate success. Like this blog for instance; when I started, I was hoping for 100000000 readers immediately. Naive, I know. But what can I do?! That's just the way my brain works my friend.

So anyways, the point of this post was to just tell you guys (and myself especially) to just finish what you start. It's not always going to end up the way you want it to, and it might not live up to your expectations. And who knows, you might actually end up with something better than you had initially anticipated. So, start a project, give it your all, and try to finish it. And take pride in it, no matter how crappy it can be!

xx, Raneem